First of all, be aware that on Friday and Saturday nights, the Castro has become the ghetto trash Bourbon Street of San Francisco. The Café, Badlands, Toad Hall and Q-Bar are overflowing with bridge-and-tunnel kids getting drunk on the cheap, and they cannot hold their liquor. I'm all for inclusion, but the gaggles of young straight girls need to learn how to behave if they want to remain welcome. As long as the messy continue to line up for those four bars, I'm good. It keeps them away from "my" bars. And off my lawn, as it were.
And if you are a straight woman visiting a gay bar: you are welcome, but show some manners. (By the way, lesbians find lame straight girls annoying too.)
Here are the brief and insufficient bar sketches, working from Hartford and 18th westward across Castro Street, then back from 18th up Castro to Market:
Moby Dick: Neighborhood bar. 30s to 50s. Above average guys, and guy's guys. Pool and pinball in the back. Awesome bar staff. Casual, comfortable crowd. Good all times. Whiskey Thursdays are tasty. While there are different happy hour specials, the only two-for-ones are for the frozen margaritas if that's your pleasure. The Mix: Neighborhood bar with more of a party/tourist air. The inside is low-ceilinged and basement like with a cramped pool table, but the back patio is open and airy, when not too smoky. Good all times.
Midnight Sun: Video bar with tv show-specific nights. Friday is bear night and very popular. Two-For-One-Plus-a-Dollar drink specials at happy hour. Get's dead by 10:00 or so. Open during renovation as it adds windows to the street side.
Harvey's: Restaurant/Bar. Simple suburban menu fare. Far from foodie, but certainly good enough. Tasty burgers. The staff is friendly and all around great guys. And it boasts full bar, which is an attraction for dining here too. Brunch has a fun energy and allows for good people watching. And heavy drinking.
Badlands: Perfect if your are a 20-something local tourist and/or a complete mess. And it is one of the only places to dance in the Castro. Two-For-One drink specials with a heavy pour. Popular with gaybys, gasians, and the young straight girls who cling to them. AKA Sadlands. AKA Shitshow. Lines Friday and Saturday. Beware of pickpockets and iPhone stealing.
The Edge: A man's bar. Sometimes older leather (rarely) but generally a late 30s to early 50s crowd. Two-for-one drink specials during happy hour, which runs until 9:00 (with wooden token, so you don't have to hold both at the same time) and also a warm and fun bar staff. Go-go boys on some nights, beer busts on weekends, and gay rodeo and other benefits are held here. Monday is showtunes night (Musical Mondays) advertised as starting at 7:00 but it's been my experience that it's more like 8:00 or 9:00. Thursdays feature The Monster Show hosted by Cookie Dough—an always fun drag show with mere $5 cover. Worth it.
Toad Hall: The hip-hop version of Badlands most nights. Ru Paul's Drag Race nights are very popular, and Friday and Saturday nights are 20s and 30s crowd with a line out front. Daytime, the crowd is more mature and pretty chill. Sunday afternoon the bar reverts to its roots with softball beer busts, 30s-50s crowd, decent music, and a fun and welcoming population. There is a large back area for smoking/chatting and ample clean urinals in the new back bathroom. Want some natural light in your bar? Go here. (No link as it seems they haven't paid their web host recently.)Up Castro Street:
Q-Bar: The college and fake ID gay crowd here, with the messy straight girl clingers. Very crowded, with a street-facing smoking room. The now defunct Cockfight night from SF Underground has been remained here, and Booty Call has the best beats. As shallow and messy as this crowd is, the bar has great dance DJs. There is no dance floor really, rather it is "tables get pulled off the concrete when it gets late enough for dancing." Considering their undying popularity with the kids, they have no incentive to offer good drinks or good service, and provide neither. When it's packed, there is definitely a sexually charged vibe. The straight girls here are almost agressively annoying and need to realize they are not in Marina South (my new name for Polk Gulch).
440: Formerly called Daddy's, and while no longer a leather bar it remains the bastion of manly manliness on the Castro. (This is also the site of the original Toad Hall in the 70s.) While you don't have to be a leather guy or muscled butch dude to hang out here, this bar is the man's man gay bar in the Castro. Yes there are muscles and bears here, but also kind regular guys, and no circuit queens nor twinks. Rarely do women accompany their male friends to this bar, but those who do are women of character who can hang. The occasional gaggle of straight girls with proverbial bows on their heads stray in here with their Kurt Hummel-eque boyfriends to check the place out for a drink, and then leave (if we're lucky) when they realize it is not their scene. Mondays are underwear night, but those have sort of fizzled, although the later the hour on any given night, the more frisky the crowd. Sundays are Sunday Furry Sundays. The primary DJ is always much fun, and there is a coat check in the back when it's open. For being a man's man sort of bar, the guys are almost all welcoming and friendly. Friday after happy hour even more so. There are regular drinks specials during the week, with wooden token two-for-ones during happy hours (until 9:00). As a rather dark bar, I tend to end the night here rather than start here, but Sunday afternoons here are fun too. I consider this "my bar."
Twin Peaks: The senior citizen's gay bar you'll love. Considering the predominantly geriatric clientele, Twin Peaks has also been known as the Gray Bar, The Glass Coffin, or God's Waiting Room. No drink specials and it doesn't need them. And if not having drink specials keeps the kids out, so much the better. The jukebox is full of fun discs, and the bathroom vents open out to the kitchen vents of Hot Cookie next door so it smells delicious. The crowd is really of all ages, but with a markedly chill vibe. It's a bar to sit and actually talk with your companions. And as an all-glass bar on the busiest corner (historic for being the first gay bar in the country with windows), it is an excellent perch for people watching. If there are empty seats at a table, ask if you can join them. Conversely, if you have extra seats at your table, offer them to those looking. It's that kind of place and I've met many lovely people that way. Also known for their coffee drinks. 
The Café: The big dance club in the Castro. Different themes each night. Lots of LEDs and disco lights, and sometimes drink specials. Very popular with the dance and club kid crowd, boys and girls, none of whom appear to live in the City proper. Also Boi night. Sunday nights feature the wildly popular and high-energy GlamaZONE hosted by Pollo Del Mar. No cover for the show unless there is some celebrity appearance. Down Market Street:
Hi Tops: The first and only true "sports bar" in the Castro. Beautifully renovated with tasty food from the back kitchen, full bar and beer selection, and surprisingly crafted cocktails. And lots of screens for lots of sports action. And a clientele with well above-average hotness. Bar staff is friendly, and game days and trivia nights (Tuesdays) are full of fun energy. The drink and food price points are on the higher end, but it's new and you're paying for the premiums which this bar provides.
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