Hot yoga, good karma

Since I injured my ankle, I've had to cut way back on the dancing, and cut out clogging all together. And with my wrist injury, which led to the elbow injury, I haven't been able to work out. So so walking, hiking, running, lifting, biking, or climbing trees with the other children. I wasn't exactly svelte to begin with and this period of inaction has caused me to balloon in an unattractive way. I decided I should try Bikram yoga again, as that seems to be a good, no-impact workout. And if I can sweat off some of these el bees before Christmas, so much the better.

I finally made myself join my neighborhood Funky Door last Saturday, and the class nearly killed me. I knew what I was getting into as I had taken two or three classes with Deb and Mike at World's Gym. Several poses into the class, I realized that those classes were ten years ago and my body is not 26 anymore. Ow. And for about half of the poses, I'm not even close.

Bikram yoga, named after it's founder Bob "There's no fucking way people will be-cramming themselves into these positions" Epstein, is the hot yoga. They pump it up to almost 120 degrees in there. Even though I was prone on the floor in the relaxing/meditative position, I still thought I was going to fall down. I was depleted, exasperated, clutching to consciousness, and trying not to pay attention to the dead relatives beckoning me towards the light.

But it is a really good workout. And I sweat until I'm spent. Sure I'm light-headed by the end of it, but hey.

Last night I was so light headed I was in a daze for the walk home, and it was much later that I noticed that my iPod Nano had dropped out of my sweatshirt pocket. Either it dropped out in the changing area, I dropped it on the street on the walk home. Not happy. I called Funky Door this morning, and someone had turned it into the front desk's lost and found. In the middle of the Haight, someone turns in a found iPod.

Yoga studios are truly a non-random sample. Good folks these.

Anyone willing to sweat and contort themselves to find wellness, wholeness, peace or their center, is likely to have a good soul to start with. If any group is going to fall on the good side of the karmic scale, it's going to be a yoga class.

Me, I'm just falling. Those postures are impossible.

Morning wisdom

From a SF Chronicle interview with 77 El Deora:

What is the meaning of life?

Life is the universe contemplating itself. Country is three chords and the truth.

That's my man Mau.

Gobble

Thanksgiving day could not have been brighter, meteorologically or emotionally. I started my day with an early-morning call from Lance inviting me for a walk with the dog along Crissy Field and the Marina Green before we went to our Thanksgiving dinner at Jeff and Bill's. With coffee go-cups in hand I was eager to hop in the Crossfire and cruise down to the Bridge. As you can see, it was just an absolutely gorgeous day—cool, crisp, and clear.


I was impressed with the number of people up and about and all athletic on this Thanksgiving morning.

Highlights of the morning included interesting people, scenic views, and as Lance repeatedly pointed out, a parade of hot guys dedicated to their daily workout routines.

Scenic views:






I have no photos of the random hotness. Even I have my lascivious limits (meager though they may be).

And a little bit of oddity for the morning-- the tiny abandoned child:


Just this wee little thing standing alone in the road, immobile.


We ultimately noticed his parents who where trying to get him to come along and were doing the "come on or we're leaving you" sort of thing. It then became this comical little game that even strangers like us started to notice and spectate.

One of my favorite sights from the morning:


No wait, that's just Barney. He biked down to join us for a bit.


I meant this:



A little girl with her mother and a hundred feet of tiny kites soaring on the Bay breeze.

After our morning at the park, Lance and I enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner prepared by Jeff Baker & Bill O'Rourke and hosted in their lovely home perched on the hill between the Castro and Noe Valley. Other than Jeff, Bill, Lance, and me, family around the table included Lupe and Rob Bodzin & Cameron Weston.



Bill & Jeff:


Turkey:


Carved:


Jeff and his table:


Wilson carving his Thanksgiving dinner:


Jack Daniels: the other dark meat.


Dinner was followed by chair/couch naps and conversation, coffee, dessert, and episodes of Coupling.

Shut up and sing

I meant to mention that last week I was happy to receive an invitation from the lovely and talented Brian Fisher to go see the documentary Shut Up and Sing--about the Dixie Chicks, the off-hand comment said on stage in a London club (surrounded by war protesters) where Natalie was quoted saying "We're ashamed that the President of the United Sates is from Texas." and their experience to the mobilization of the right wing to destroy the Chicks and their carrers.

Great documentary. Highly recommended.

And so not controversial. Disappointing (in displaying the intelligence of the average American) and a little scary (death threats, the power of partisan corporations), but not controversial, and I am appalled that NBC won't run ads for the documentary because portions of the film (not the ads mind you) may be critical of the President. Whatever.

We say the film on Monday (the 20th), and I didn't learn until that day that the Chicks played in Oakland the previous Friday. It wasn't sold out and I would have loved to have attended. But then I wouldn't have seen Casino Royale with Delicious Dean. Ah, choices.

I am not a documentary sort of guy usually, and this was great work. Go see it.

Until then, here's the cathartic video (very "The Crucible") of the first single from the new album:

"Not Ready to Make Nice."

red five standing by

Hey kids. It's been a busy Thanksgiving holiday and recovery. It's surprizing how the pile of work on my desk was not in fact completed by elves in my absence. (But what's the hell with all the shoes?)

Sometime this morning I expect to put up a Thanksgiving post and a little something something about Kevin and mine adventure last night.

However Blogger has scheduled an outage to start at 10:00 and I don't know when service will resume. Check back later.

Another example of Homeland Security being more like Keystone Cops

via Boing Boing:

Minneapoliteans who dressed up as zombies and were busted for "simulating weapons of mass destruction" because their costumes had wires sticking out them are suing the city for being freaking idiots.

Link

Less "stacks," more "stacked"

From This Is London:

A shake-up of Britain's libraries has been called for by a senior spin-doctor - including a ban on the word "librarian". The Westminster council official said libraries should also spice up their reputation by using "good-looking" staff for press and marketing work and by stressing their range of "racy" titles.

Of course, librarians know how sexy we are. Who else spends so much time around those bound in leather.

The proposals were met with disgust by librarians, who dismissed the idea that they are not glamorous or exciting.

If the pun hadn't been beaten to death during the foley scandal, I would make some suggestion about bending over the pages.

Dear Lord.

(Take that as you like it--invocation or exasperation.)

From Alert Reader and Actual Brother Mac Hardcastle:

Mac called me today to wish me a happy Thanksgiving and to say he was going to miss me at dinner tomorrow. His wife's mother, Pat, has generously decided to host their Thanksgiving dinner tonight so that her family can all be together for the holiday dinner and the married children can have dinner with their in-laws on Thanksgiving. This way no one gets left out.

She has also asked Mac to give the blessing.

I am the shy, quiet, stoic child next to Mac. While Mac can at times be serious and devout, it is not, shall we say, his natural state.

He has been trying to draft his blessing, but it keeps coming out in verse. And to some extent, along the lines of "There once was a Thanksgiving on Nantucket..."

Looking online, for inspiration I suppose, he found the serious Web site devoted to Thanksgiving: Thanksgiving-November dot com. The site also has samples of Thanksgiving prayers.

Clearly, or hopefully, someone has cracked into this site and made some slight alterations to the Prayer for Thanksgiving, cited as being the prayer President George W. Bush made before the troops at Thanksgiving dinner at Fort Campbell, KY, in November of 2001.

What do I have to be most thankful for this Thanksgiving that I share with the President? I too am thankful that God has not smited (smote?) me down by "being trampled under the massive hooves of an enraged stagecoach Clydesdale."

Amen.

Happy Thanksgiving y'all!

Caught in the Crossfire

This past weekend, Lance had a couple staying with him--visiting from London with their two-year-old. Lance needed a car they could tour around in that would hold the three of them and a baby seat. So Lance asked if we could switch cars for the weekend. Trading Linda for his Crossfire (remember how much Andrew loved it?), I came out ahead in the deal.

Originally I was worried about taking responsibility his spakin' new and expensive toy.

That lasted until I reached the end of the block. This is one superior machine. It drives like a dream, corners on rails, and I miss having a convertible.

Saturday "morning" Shilpa called interested in bruch. The sun was shining--not a cloud in the sky--and the air was comfortably between cool and warm. So I said yes to food, and that I would drive. We cruised down to Ocean Beach for a few minutes (just long enough for a detour along the water to watch all the surfers changing clothes) and then up to Land's End. It was an absolutely georgous day.


It was a perfect day for the top down, and I must say that that car becomes me.


And of course, I had Shilpa too. My moll.


Ultimately, we went for lunch at Harvey's in the Castro-- to feed our addiction to good sandwiches and curly fries. We enjoyed the sunshine and the general parade of people who flock to the Castro to enjoy sunny Saturdays as these (and at the table I was on the receiving end of a particularly intense goodbye kiss from Boxcar. The man can still push my buttons. Or at least one button. The one that says "on.")

Walking around, I caught a glimpse of what could be a wonderful photo-- an older woman in the window of the trattoria sipping her latte with a big hat, huge smile, and novelty heart-shaped glasses. I asked if I could take her picture. But instead of holding the pose, she got very engaged, revealing to us her obvious dementia, demanded she do a catwalk on the sidewalk and twirl her coat and feathers. She was adamant I get a shot of her shoes of which she was very proud--red velvet boots with soles mended by a hearty wrapping of aluminum foil.


After lunch Shilpa and I over-comsumed at Under One Roof. Which isn't really a bad thing-- all profits from the store go directly to local charities, and I got a couple of belated birthday gifts and a lot of advance Christmas shopping accomplished. Shilpa and I are looking into having a private shopping/cocktail event there one night as our Christmas party.

Foreign affairs- update

Kevin decided not to stay at the "you can't be a couple-you are two guys" ski lodge after all. And he has added his experience to the Trip Advisor reviews.

Thanksgiving in the wild

Otherwise entitled: "This time of year, even animals bite off more than they can chew."

You think you're going to eat a lot on Thursday? The expression "pigging out" should be supplanted by "snaking-out." But only because "pythoning-out" just sounds stupid.

Python explodes after trying to swallow an alligator.

Busy B

Hey kids. Work/life a little crammed right now. Posts to resume soon. Hopefully tonight.

In the meantime, this might explain some things about why you are so popular at the bar.

And after you read that, you might want a pair of these.

Bondage gets me excited

I am crazy excited to see the new Bond flick tonight. I loved Timothy Dalton as Bond because he took it to a more faithful, tough, hard place. But still, for me that Bond was a little too cute, and way too long on running time. Bronson has been a delight, but in an overly slick, flirty, wink-at-the-audience sort of way.

The reviews of the hard-bodied and hard-edged Craig have been beyond stellar. I am looking forward to a Bond flick with a dangerous agent who has more acting talents than gadgets.

Give yourself a treat and read this Rolling Stone review.

Update: Best Bond movie ever. So many people are saying Daniel Craig is the "best Bond since Connery" but I will risk the ire of the blindly faithful acolytes and say, no, Craig is the best Bond yet, period. Yes, even better than Connery. And while the shameless promotion in Die Buy Another Day was nauseating, the product placement in Casino Royale was distracting and sickening, but only to the level of annoyance, and only about five or six times. Product placement should not eject the viewer from the story and make them realize they are watching an advert.

Short review: I loved this movie--beautifully shot, well written, and with stellar acting. And it was cool.

All who gerrymander are, in fact, lost.

I have always HATED gerrymandering-- the contortionist drawing of congressional boundaries to keep those drawing the lines in power, almost always to expressly discriminate and disenfranchise a minority population. This practice is almost universal across the United States and blithely expected, even though it is blatantly contrary to the ideals of the Constitution and the basic principals of congressional representation. It is an ugly loophole never to be closed because while it is against the best interests of the voters, it is in the best interests of the elected.

Conservative commentator Andrew Sullivan reports in his blog on a proposal to use an impartial computer to redistrict congressional boundaries using census data and an algorithm devised using a set of debated and ranked criteria. The over-riding guiding principles of the algorithm would be geographical contiguity, equality in population, and compactness.

Oh perchance to dream--one easy, obvious step to make politics and our government less sleazy, corrupt, partial, and gratutiously partisan.

Awesome update!

Wow. Remember this way back when?

B of A totally screwed one of their customers: they falsely arrested him, threw him in jail, completely traumatized him, made him pay top dollar for their mistake, didn't apologize, and can't be sued for it.

Tonight I see on Boing Boing, that Bank of America has lost more than $50 million from customers upset over false arrest.

Sweet.

My mother used to make a good brown betty...

No, it's not the Air Up There.

It's all about the "Hair Down There."

But is their brown betty good enough to eat?

(I'm on "no.")


Another credit to Alert Reader Paul Day.

WTF WTVF?

This morning I read a little something disturbing online. Unfortunately, I had a meeting to prepare for, and then the meeting itself, and am just now getting around to dealing with it.

It was a minor news item sent to me by Alert Reader Paul Day. It was an item from TMZ.com:

Delta Burke Too Gay For Nashville

Delta Burke and Leslie Jordan were "uninvited" from a Nashville TV talk show, when show's producer thought the plays they were promoting might offend the show's "very conservative viewership."

If you haven't clued in yet, I'm from Nashville, hence the forward.

The "Nashville TV talk show" in question is WTVF Channel 5's Talk of the Town. While Nashville is fairly conservative, it is so much less than it used to be. The major benefit for Nashville CARES (Community AIDS Resources, Education, and Services) is ArtRageous-- which is the largest reserved-ticket fundraiser in the country. Nashville used to have the largest (by square feet) gay bar in the United States. The Middle Tennessee market may have some hicks, but it certainly has a ton of fags and fag-friendlies.

WTVF Channel 5, however, has always been a bit conservative. And their little local noon-ish show (so written as not to be confused with the old Nashville program: The Noon Show hosted by Teddy Bart, also WTVF) is pretty much geared to those at home in the middle of the day--typically housewives/homemakers and such, who in this market do tend to be Christian Conservatives. (Honest comment to the school board during the debate on making a foreign language class a requirement in the public schools: "If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it's good enough for me!")

My brother Mac used to work at Channel 5. Before being Big Man in Sales he worked for ToTT. Sally-My-Friend still works for Channel 5. Mac has been on Talk of the Town. My mother has been on Talk of the Town. Hell my Grandmother was once on Talk of the Town as a senior model. I have been on Talk of the Town.

What I'm saying here is that it's not like scoring a spot on Oprah. Who, by the way, was once a local newsperson in Nashville, with Pat Sajak who did our weather. But I think Oprah was on Channel 4. But last I heard she was still friendly with Harry what's-his-name who does the Channel 5 news and also used to host ToTT. Maybe he still does. I haven't lived in Nashville for over a decade. But I digress.

Once my meeting was out I finally got the chance to call Melissa and give her grief for the "Delta Burke and Leslie Jordan too gay for Talk of the Town" bit. But considering the time difference, Melissa had since left her desk to go home. I did talk to brother Mac who thought the whole sitch was asinine and amusing.

When I got back to my office I thought I'd post a little about this as I loved Sordid Lives, Delta Burke, Leslie Jordan, saw his three-day only one-man laughing fit that was Like A Dog on Linoleum when he was here in SF, am from Nashville, know folks at WTVF, and have a long history with Talk of the Town.

I got back to my desk and came up with the WTF WTVF bit and thought: "this is the sort of thing that will get all the nancy knickers in a twist. It will be all over the blogosphere and Channel 5's lone receptionist is going to be overwhelmed with calls." I did a quick Google search using the string "wtvf gay delta burke" and oh my stars and garters there are 646 hits. All lambasting the "too gay" thing and the tacky "uninvitation." Imagine if I included Leslie Jordan instead.

Delta and Leslie were uninvited because the producer finally got around to reading what the plays Delta and Leslie were performing in town were about. These plays are Sordid Lives and Southern Baptist Sissies. Well let out your gasp and clutch those pearls--those plays have homosexual content!

Quick! Shoo them away. I might get a thought in my head! I'll just scream "Praise Jesus!" until the threat of new ideas goes away.

Regardless of the plays or the content-- these plays which have received numerous awards, critical acclaim, cult status, and made into a major motion picture including stars like Beau Bridges and Olivia Newton John-- what was the producer thinking that it would be a bad idea to have them on just because Leslie is gay and Delta is gay-friendly. Did the producer think they would lose viewers if she advertised "featuring stars of Designing Women and Will & Grace!" (I am assuming the producer is a she. This seems like a social climbing Nashville redneck woman sort of thing to do.)

As one person put it, I don't think she is giving Nashville viewers much credit. And if she does think that Talk of the Town viewers are all a bunch of bigoted morons, then perhaps it would be good and responsible programming to feature happy, entertaining, Emmy-winning, and hilarious celebrities who are either gay or gay-okay?

Seriously, this was a stupid, stupid, bigoted, and amateur move by the producer. This wasn't a smart production choice to avoid a few calls from bigots with curlers in their hair without anything better to do. This was a foolish decision which took about a day to bite her in the ass.

Not only was this bad TV business, to uninvite someone is just bad manners. And being from Nashville, I may find that the most offensive of all.

Update: Read the press release from the playwright Del Shores, Delta Burke, and Leslie Jordan.

I am so embarassed for Nashville.

Local free-paper coverage: The Church Street Freedom Press

CORRECTIONS: I have been informed by a Nashville Media Insider that Oprah and Pat Sajak were in fact on WTVF Channel 5. Teddy Bart and his Noon Show were on WSMV Channel 4, the NBC affiliate. And Harry Chapman has retired.

Also noted was that while this was a bit of a frenzy, the freepers are much more organized and Nashville stations get thousands of Christian Conservatives calling to complain about anything their mail-list or Web site tells them too. The CBS affiliate had to field calls complaining about the Madonna concert. Which not only had not yet aired (I love how conservatives feel the need to complain about or ban something they haven't even seen.), but the concert is airing on a different station altogether (the NBC affiliate).

The report regarding the "univitation" seems to be it was a typical miscommunication by e-mail. The feeling is that if there had been a phone call and voice discussion rather than a succint e-mail devoid of tone or context, this would not have become an issue.

Alert Samuel L. MacJackson

iPods on a plane!

Touch me up, Buttercup

Is the artistry in the photography or in the the touching up of the photograph? No wonder women feel so crappy about how they look. And I'm going to stop sighing quite so crestfallen at photos of handsome men. Apparently, no one looks remotely like their magazine photo.

Via Gawker, here's a vid from Dove's Real Beauty campaign:



But as a graphic artist and amateur Photoshopper, I am impressed as hell at the skill and artistry of some of the designers out there. For truly impressive after-and-before examples, click over to FluidEffect. You'll see their "after" first, then the before to see what they had to work with: from the homepage, click through "Portfolio," Agree to the terms, and the "before/after" from the submenu.

Hey... Buddy...

Wanna buy a bridge?

The evangelical war against mental health

Proceed At Your Own Risk, recent Verve blog award winner for Best Writing, has an interesting take (below the level of rant) on Conservative/Evangelical Christianity and the complete failure of the United States to address mental health issues in a, shall we say, sane way. It's worth a read.

It starts like this:

Among Western nations, the United States is noted for its lagging mental health care system. In no other industrialized nation is mental illness and the recognition and treatment of mental illness so badly neglected by society, the government and the health care system. Hundreds of thousands of Americans live in darkness and pain because of our indifference. Homelessness is one manifestation of this failure. The Closet is another. In both cases, our society is responsible for causing the disease, exacerbating the disease and then ignoring the disease.

Now consider that recent surveys tell us that the United States is second only to Turkey among industrialized nations when it come to the prevalence and influence of religious fundamentalism. We rank at the bottom of almost every list that ranks industrialized country's according to education and knowledge--primarily due to the fact that a solid majority of Americans take Biblical word over established science. While this amuses some and seems insignificant to others, the fact is that it has serious repercussions in terms of mental health.

The connection between the mental health travesty in the United States and Evangelical Christianity is clear.

Too many Americans believe that the cure for pathologic self-destructive behavior is to be found in Jesus rather than professional health care. Scientifically grounded understanding of various illnesses is cast aside with arrogance and cruelty. We mostly have stopped calling in exorcists to cure schizophrenics, and yet we still debate the merits of Christian reparative therapy for homosexuals.

Not surprising, there are politics in politics

It seems the Dems had a little squabble over whom to elect to House Majority Leader. From the AP (via SFGate): "Democrats on Thursday chose Maryland Rep. Steny Hoyer to be House majority leader over Rep. John Murtha, brushing aside the choice of House Speaker-elect Nancy Pelosi." Many paragraphs later: "Many Democrats were dismayed that the family feud had broken out in the first place and objected to heavy pressure placed on longstanding Hoyer supporters."

The article closes with: "In the Democratic race, Murtha came forward for the job despite a record of not always being a leadership loyalist. He often supplied votes to GOP leaders who were struggling to pass bills. The none-too-subtle trade-off: Murtha and his allies would do better when home-state projects were doled out by the Republicans. Murtha also had been criticized by ethics watchdogs such as Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington, who have said he exemplifies a 'pay-to-play' culture of Washington."

There's that, and Muthra is not known for his regard for civil welfare or playing well with others, judging by all those fights with Godzilla.

Linda's getting an iPod

Mom and Dad gave me a gift certificate to BSW/Bavarian Soundwerks for my birthday. My "new" BMW 325i, aka Linda, is a 2001 model. The 2002s and later have a fairly easy and inexpensive upgrade for bluetooth phones and iPod integration. 2001s and earlier are a little trickier, and way more expensive.

According to the dealer:
Bluetooth set for 2002s and later: approximately $200.
For mine: approximately $1,800.

I bought a good bluetooth headset for $100 and called it done. (Of course, that was the same day the phone was stolen so that was a little moot.)

iPod integration with 2005+ BMWs: easy.
Dealer simple aux cable installation for the 2001: $600.
BSW/Bavarian Soundwerks full integration: $160 plus installation.

I have been procrastinating on ordering the kit from BSW in case I could find a local or dealer solution. What I found out is that it is a waste of money to deal with the dealers. I finally put in a call today (instead of ordering online as I had some additional questions). Since my parents gave me the GC in August, BSW has designed a dock that integrates through the ashtray for another $130. This is so much sleeker than a loose cable and I added that to my order from the knowledgeable and kind BSW folks in Atlanta (if you look them up, ask for Halston).

Once installed, not only will I be able to play the iPod through the sweet BMW system (radio transmitters don't work in the City with the over-crowded spectrum), but I will be able to control the iPod via the stero controls or those on the steering wheel, and the track information will be diplayed on the BMW stero display.

No I just need someone to install it. Any advice?

(It is rumored to be so easy I should try doing it myself, but I am not so confident as to tear open my dashboard myself.)

MacBooks in MacBlack

Surely by now you know that the MacBooks, like the iPods, are available in black as well as white.


The black version comes with a $150 premium.
Enjoy the spoof:

tough love

I got some tough loving from Barney in my in-box this morning.
(And I don't mean that in a dirty way.)

I do, in fact, plan on having at least one surgery, but I'm thinking the palate reduction and the tonsillectomy are it for me. If that doesn't work, I'll try the freakin CPAP. That would be big hassle, but I am really put off by the risks and details of the other procedures.

wilson,

just reading your blog.

how can you even be debating whether to do all the surgeries or not!
you're insane! given your current issues you should grab any chance of
getting some intervention.

just think how bad this is going to be 5 years time if you don't get
all the help now.

i want to tell you to 'grow some balls' and you know that's love.

if you get me started on the subject in person you now know my stance
and i will badger you if you bring this up....;-}

kisses XB

PS sorry for the early morning slap.

Of course, all this loving health advice comes from a chain smoker on whom all of my harassing has had no effect...

Respiratory Distress

I saw my doctor today, more specifically, my handsome otolaryngologist. Two years ago this Thanksgiving I had the first of hopefully only two surgeries to treat my obstructive sleep apnea.

And I am now in emotional distress, respiratory.

My understanding from the last procedure is that this would be a two-parter--two procedures not performed simultaneously as the body and airway couldn't handle all that stress at once. The second surgery, to remove some of my soft palate, I could postpone for a year or two. The first year I postponed it to take a trip to Europe. Now I have been biding my time to accrue the three weeks of sick days necessary for the painful recovery period.

I met with the doctor today to review the procedures so I could clear it with my medical plan. We are in the open enrollment period here are work and I need to decide to change my health plan or not--and decide how much to put in a HCRA account to cover the difference (pay withheld on a pre-tax basis for medical expenses).

I met with Dr. K today, and it seems it is more complicated than that. After reviewing my video from the last time, a "simple" palate reduction might not do it. He has also recommended genioglossus advancement-- a procedure in which they cut a hole in the jaw behind the lower lip and under the teeth and then pull the tongue through to move the tongue forward (YIPES!) a teensy bit; hyoid suspension (ew), and/or tongue radiofrequency-which has serious risks to taste and swallowing ability.

My snoring is insane, and the obstructive apnea is slowing killing me. I desperately need a good night's sleep. Brother Mac has been using a CPAP mask/machine, but I really don't want to spent the rest of my life, much less my remaining dating life, hooked up to a machine just so I can sleep better.

Dr. K. gave me a week to read about these procedures and come back and plan what we'll do. I'm okay with the palate surgery, and he'll take out the tonsils while he's in there. It'll hurt, but it should stop a lot of the obstruction, and hopefully most (dare to dream--all) of the snoring.

The other three I am rating, respectively: (1) Are you freaking INSANE? (2) Uh, I'm on "no." and (3) after reading the risks, I'd rather not.

Criminey. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. But Kevin wants me to schedule my surgery to coincide with his (shoulder) so we can recuperate with DVDs and painkillers together.

clean shaven

In case you were wondering, as of this morning the beard has gone bye-bye. Damn that itched. And who knew it would take so long to shave off?

By this morning it was pretty thick. Shilps finally got the Fleurtini Friday shots online. I'll add some to my flickr account too so you can see them, after I wade through the 127 shots she has shared with me...

stubbly:

Singing in a lost key

When I retrieved some of the stuff stolen with my car, I found six sets of keys that were given to me for when friends lock themselves out of their homes. I carefully did not label them in case someone nefarious person found/stole them. I can identify two sets of keys, but I am left with these four.

lost (found?) keys

I have no idea to whom they belong. If you recognize yours, send me an e-mail.



Update: A and B have been claimed. Anybody else?

time waster/laugh generator

Generally, I'm not into cats and hate cat photos. The whole "put photos of your cat on the internet" thing just seriously creeps me out. And considering the sick crap I find amusing online, that is saying something.

But someone took the meme "I'm in your (X), (Y)-ing your (Z)" with cat photos and it's pretty funny-- clearly written by others like me amused by sick crap they find on the Web.

Series of similar via Boing Boing.

Love it:

I didn't do it!

Waiting to avail

It's been a busy, wet, miserably dark and cold day here. I haven't had anything of note to post and so have not. Fleurtini Friday, Brain's brief hit-and-run appearance notwithstanding, was a rousing success and we all had a great time. Mixing the late 30s gay crowd and the late 20s straight crowd worked exceptionally well, largely because Shilpa's and my friends and comparably crazy. The girls loved the gay men, some a little too demonstratively, and their husbands/menfolk merely looked on in restrained dismay. Gay men get all the play. Oh the irony.

(I totally got to second base with Craig's sister.)

All day I have postponed posting about Fleurtini Friday as I took zero photos and have been waiting to avail myself of Shilpa's hundred-plus photos sure to appear on Flickr at any moment. However, Shilpa left work early in the day and has been at home heaving up bad sushi, so it might be a day or two before picture appear.

Saturday I cruised down the peninsula with Kevin as we made a day out of our far-flung errands. I needed to return a shirt to Western Warehouse, and he needed to get his inflatable furniture out of his storage locker for the Christmas party.

Kevin and his big locker of costumes and crap.

Kevin's storage lockers are way out in the middle of nowhere in the forgotten flats past the Dunbarton Bridge. You know, where they store the arc of the covenant.

New Blog Name

If I can figure out how to add a tag line, this is my new life motto:

Drinking from rose-colored glasses.




Organically grown from a conversation with Coco, at Fleurtini Friday.

A.C.T.ing Out

Wednesday night was another Out with A.C.T. night, and as always Kevin and I had a great time.

I am typing this up at Café Flore, sitting on the patio, and freezing my ass off as the sun dips towards the horizon and the fog rolls in. My fingers are shaking and typing is frustrating so I'll keep this one short.

Highlights of the evening:

First hightlight-
Having dinner before the show at a mediocre yet overpriced mexican restaurant off Union Square, only to find it was to be dinner and a show. It was karaoke night. And four or five scary numbers later, as the karaoke standard "Copacabana" started, I looked up to see Susannah's brother-in-law with the microphone. Susannah is a best friend in Nashville. Small world.

Next highlight-
Kevin, who works as an emergency room nurse, was sharing another "foreign body" story. Never mind the guy who came in having botched his, and I am not making this up, mail-order self-vasectomy kit, the case of the week went to a man complaining of abdominal pain:

"Okay, so you've lodged a cucumber up your ass. We get that a lot. One cucumber, fine. That's what we're here for. Two, we have to have a talk."
They had to admit the guy to surgery because he tore something inside. Yipes.

But I loved Kevin's musings on this situation, "One, okay, but to lodge two cucumbers up there? Where does the mind go to get to that point?" "
Me: "Too much of a good thing?"
"I mean, did he think he misplaced the first one and went to the fridge and got another?... But really, the lesson here is..."
"Don't shove hard vegetables up your ass?"
"Tie a string to your cucumber."

Next item-
During the first intermission, Kevin and I chatted with our theater buddy Randy, who works at A.C.T. Across the lobby I saw an old acquaintance who was decked out in blazer and ascot. He greeted me and I introduced him to Randy. After the he left, Randy turned to me and said "I wish I could wear an ascot..."
Me: "So does he."
Randy is a bit heavy and he said his neck precludes ascots. I consoled him that "only one person could wear an ascot. That was Fred from Scooby Doo. And that's only because he was animated, and it was the seventies."


Okay, I'm freezing, and I have to move my car before my time is up. It's Fleurtini Friday and I must go prepare. Later.

San Francisco Tourist

• Cross Golden Gate Bridge: check
• Visit Golden Gate Park: check
• Ride a cable car: check
• Visit Fisherman's Warf: check
• Tour Chinatown: check
• Go to the top of Coit Tower: check
• Get your picture taken on a cable car/
  in front of the pyramid/
  in front of a Bridge: check
• Eat sourdough bread: check
• Tour the dildo factory: checkcheckcheckahhhh

Mapmaker, mapmaker

make me a map.

I have always been fascinated by the different means devised to envision information. This blog explores or presents various expressions of geographic information. We all saw during the election this week how the United States can be drawn as a binary map: red and blue. Today's Strange Maps' post tells us that "In January of 2004, the Boston Globe newspaper issued an original variation on the theme of political preferences in America: it divided the country into 10 distinct, but not necessarily contiguous areas. The regions were based on election results, demographic data and certain geographic features." Pretty interesting.

While in the US, the geographical distinction between the good people and the carpetbaggers is generally accepted to be the Mason-Dixon line, there are much more interesting ways to delineate and differentiate qualities of the north and south. An example of European north/south linear divides (linguistically, religiously, topographically, meteorological):



Then, of course, you can always pick up a copy of "Let's Go! Mongo"

Sorta blows away Google Earth.

as to be expected

Ironic headline of the month:

Fire breaks out at Salt Lake crematorium

Caskets and remains reduced to ash? Clients paid for the burning. Arson charges considered.

At least it wasn't headlined as a grease fire. Nor were there variants of 'pulling his fat out of the fire.' Because that would be wrong.





I love copy editors.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose,

but you can't pick your friend's nose.

But Gorillas', sure. Whatever.

Kids pick Gorilla Boogers as favorite snot snack

Via Dave Barry.

Shilpa's boyfriend gets more popular

It seems the NextBus service, available online and by calling 511 (aka Shilpa's boyfriend), has "hidden" information on a slew of transit lines also accessible online. The service only officially lists predictions for the rail lines, the 22 Fillmore and the 24 Divisidero (aka the Divisdon't), and now the 33 Stanyan.

SF Riders take note that you can get information on the following lines (complete list):

1-California
3-Jackson
4-Sutter
5-Fulton
6-Parnassus
7-Haight
14-Mission
21-Hayes
22-Fillmore
24-Divisadero
30-Stockton
31-Balboa
33-Stanyan
41-Union
45-Union/Stockton
49-Van Ness/Mission
59-Powell-Mason Cable Car
60-Powell-Hyde Cable Car
61-California Cable Car
F-Market & Wharves
J-Church
K-Ingleside
L-Taraval
M-Ocean View
N-Judah
S-Castro Shuttle

Reporting, links, and discussion on:
SF Muni at LiveJournal
MetroBlog SF, and
43 Folders

strong enough for a man, but made by a woman

Secret fights wetness, but her secret is wetness.

If you're squeemish, turn back now.

Scanning Craig's List personals is a popular pasttime. The M4M section is just home-grown porn really. But I believe the true feak flowers are hiding in the Women-Seeking-Men category, hiding amongst the clover. It's always nice to find a benchmark to measure your interests against. Now while I have nothing against this woman's interest, and understand such is quite widely if quietly celebrated, it's so not for me. But I am compulsively neat and clean and a bit, shall we say here, retentive.

what I'd like to do tonight
Reply to: XXXXXXXXXXXX
Date: 2006-11-03, 5:03PM

hi eveyone,

sometimes I like to have a little accident and I've been in a mood to share that with someone tonight. I was thinking I could come over to your place, we'd chat for a while (I love to flirt with good looking men!), I'd be desperate to pee since I've held it in all day. We'd become more comfortable, I'd sit on your lap (we'll both be fully dressed), and I'll slowly let go of all my pee. You get turned on by my warmth, wetness and smell, maybe you add some of your pee.

I'm looking to do this with someone who's smart and well spoken, can act like they're not a pervert, and has a place to do this. You should be between 21 and 34 and relatively good look. I want to do this with a male, although any girls into this, feel free to contact me, I'd love to have a wet friend in the future.

By the way, there's no chance that this will turn into actual intercourse so if you don’t think you can control yourself, don't respond. I have a paranoia of STDs. Please include pictures with any responses.

w4m

Original URL:

Blogger Clogger

And not blogging about clogging.

It seems I am far from the only one with frequent frustrations with the Blogger service. Many, many people experience outages and failures when using Google's Blogger service. (from MacWorld)

Election fever caused by infection

AGAIN with the election fraud and voter tampering. And, again, by Republicans. Truly the party of fear. Not only must they peddle lies and fear to get votes and push their agenda, they are so afraid of losing power that open corruption is seen as a valid means to an end-- just as lying to Congress, the UN, and the American people was/is a valid means to an end. I want to be proud of my country, but I am so ashamed of my government.

Guest Blogger

Last night I agreed to go with Shilpa to the Border's at Union Square to meet the Pet Shop Boys and have them sign their newest Greatest Hits CD set. The signing started at six and we hoped to leave my place 6:00ish. Of course, I spilled the roadie down my pants which delayed us a trifle (7 minutes to the next N). After an evening of shopping around Union Square-- starting at fashionable H&M whose "XL" is so freakin "S" I felt abused and ridiculed like Carrie at the prom; in contrast to the uber-casual Old Navy and their comfortably ample "L"s (which in my case stand for Love)--I told Shilpa she could guest-blog the evening as I didn't have anything particularly funny to write about the albeit silly evening.

Shilpa e-mailed me her guest post, but admitted it was more of a rant:

They May Be Queer, But They Certainly Weren't Here [RANT]

All I wanted to do was meet the Pet Shop Boys. Sure, I'm going to their concert today, but to be within a foot of techno-pop greatness? This was an opportunity not to be missed. PopArt (their latest greatest hits CD) in one hand, and whore's coffee in the other, a very willing Wilson (if I had a dime) and I were about to embark on this unholiest of pilgrimages. Until like any good whore, the coffee ended up in Wilson's lap. After a quick costume change, Wilson and I boalted for the N-Judah, bum ankle, refreshed coffees and all. All of our efforts were not wasted, we made the train, and strolled into the Border's Books on Union Square at 6:50. Only to be informed that the Pet Shop Boys had left just 5 minutes before as the crowd had dwindled. Dismay. Disappointment. Shock. Awe. And then anger. Hell hath no fury like a straight woman in a gay town. It's bad enough you flaunt you perfectly taut bodies and ridiculously good fashion sense. "Oh, damn, he's gay," has become a daily mantra of mine since my hopes get dashed by you lot every other second. I know you don't want me. I get that. But c'mon, you were supposed to show up at the Borders in full force! How could you let the Pet Shop Boys leave in 45 minutes?!? Where is the love? Next time, the Boys should do their signing at the H&M down the block. Then, I'd have at least until 8pm to get there.

Rock the vote, going to tip the vote over.

But not in an insidious electronic voting fraud sort of way.

Off to my polling place.

(Gads--I've been in this town too long. A "polling place" just sounds so dirty.)

You are so transparent

When I was a kid, someone gave a a book called Scrambled Chickens (subtitled "and 74 other eccentric how-to's"). My best friend Jonathan Harwell and I thought this was HILARIOUS. The how-to's included things like "How to sound insane:" With instructions including "Say things like 'How does a chicken?' and 'Which would you rather be, an orange?'.

In one how-to, the book gave detailed instructions and a recipie for a potion to make you invisible. I believe it called for, among other things, one tablespoon of Silly Putty. (Side effect: you will also be able to pick up cartoons with your forehead.)

I never tried this recipie, but it might have worked out better for this guy.

From the Metro (UK):

In the long list of criminal dos and don'ts, one of the top pieces of advice – above not robbing a CCTV camera shop, or not forging banknotes with running ink – has to be 'never rob a bank thinking that you're invisible when you're not actually invisible.' Sadly for one man in Iran, he made just that mistake – and as a result, police in Tehran are hunting a fake sorcerer who convinced the man he was invisible and so could rob banks safely.

Follow the link--you'll love the photo and caption the paper ran with the story.

Enclyclopedia Brown

My reference to EB vis-à-vis Veronica Mars has initiated some discussion. I loved the Enclycopedia Brown books as a kid and it's nice to know I am not alone. You can read the Wikipedia entry here. I never knew HBO made a mini-series out of the books. Very cool.

Sadly, poor Leroy met an untimely end.

Election fever?

Actually, it's more of a rash.

a fine weekend

with no kisses.

Good Monday everybody. It was a pleasant sunny weekend without major incident nor drama so no ribald narrative this morning.

I went back to acupuncture Friday. Last time it was uneventful--just interesting really. This time it hurt. I am supposed to rest/sleep lying on my back with the needles in various places. However with my apnea, as soon as I relax enough to nod off, my airway closes and I stop breathing then jerk awake as I asphyxiate. So that's not really relaxing or peaceful or making with the good chi. I stopped in for lunch at the counter at Fuzio and sat next to Armistead Maupin. I've met him before but merely nodded an acknowledgment and let the man enjoy his meal in peace.

Saturday was one of the recurring silly shopping and lunching days with Barney--he schedules these dates with me as it is hard to schlep an ironing board or mattress pad from Bloodbath & Beyond on a bicycle. Shilpa also had some BBB needs and we managed a fun day of Tap Plastics, BMW, and BB&B and a sunny, sidewalk brunch on Potrero Hill with RMJ.

We dropped Barney and RMJ off for siestas and Shilpa and I went to watch the sunset and have a cocktail at the Metro. We stayed long enough for me to chat up a young, handsome English ex-pat chain-smoker, who was exceptionally engaging...until we were joined by his boyfriend. This happens to me far too often.

I ended the night with drinks with Lance and Beth & Greg. Lance is a Kiwi and Greg is Polish and the night was a long discussion on American politics and foreign policy. A very different mood than expected as originally we had talked of seeing Flushed Away. But that Beth is always a gas.

Sunday featured a long lazy day of working around the apartment and doing laundry. Ultimately I just curled up with pizza and the Veronica Mars Season DVDs I got with Shilpa at the Tower going-out-of business sale.

Watching so many episodes in a row from the beginning I realized what truly good television this is. One reviewer called her "more Philip Marlow than Nancy Drew." She is written tough and hip, but even so I still keep thinking of Encyclopedia Brown. Nextflix it if you haven't seen it yet.

And in local news...

Rectum? Rectum? It nearly killed him!

You know, I thought all the crazy ass people (no pun intended) were in SF. But it's the Bay Area burbs that have the real freaks.

It's awl right now.

You've got to be shitting me.

From my friend Pete over at the Cult of Mac Blog--

SkyMall advertising iPod Dock/Toilet Paper Roll.

I am assuming the absurdity of this is self-evident and you require no further comment from me. And if you disagree, you can go wipe yourself.

Update: Can you imagine the potty playlist?

• Diana Ross and the Supes: "I'm Coming Out"
• Wilson Phillips: "Release Me"
• Blondie: "One Way or Another"
• Willie Nelson: "Pretty Paper"
• Etta James: "Ooh Poo Pah Doo"
• Theme song: "Winnie the Pooh"
• Beach Boys: "Wipe Out"
• White Snake: "Here I Go Again"
• Beatles: "We Can Work It Out"
  
• Salt-N-Pepa: "Push It"
• The Gap Band: "You Dropped a Bomb on Me"
  

Feel free to comment.

Rock the vote? GOP tips the vote over.

Why is it one never hears that voting machines have been rigged to change Republican votes to Democratic? Why are there always news reports of problems and voter fraud in minority polling places? This whole stealing of elections is so nauseating? And one would think the sanctity of the democratic vote would be a Republican, patriotic issue, and not a repeatedly Republican scandal. And where is the outrage?! How are these tampered votes not overturned. Well, I suppose we saw fraud succeed in 2000 and 2004, why should I have any more faith in the games system?

Florida voting machines count Democratic votes as Republican (and here)
Also in Texas.

And does anyone remember Ohio? What's being done to prevent a repeat offence?

TSA-holes

The new predominant rant acorss the blogosphere is the inanity of airport security, its laxness, its ineffectiveness, and most often intensely annoying actions of mentally-challenged airport security agents who are either abusing their perceived power or are just invasively frustrating without cause and doing little to nothing to actually improve air safety.

Like this well-written rant from a guy who was told it was illegal to wear sunglasses in LAX, or drink his bottled water before throwing it away.

And of course the useless checking of boarding passes, much less double-checking of the passes just a meter or two later, has been parodied by the many boarding-pass generators on the web.

Why does no one seem to remeber that any and all terrorists trying to affect air travel have all had valid IDs and boarding passes?

Another favorite is the guy who decided to express his opinion about the whole "you can only carry liquids under three ounces and in a clear plastic bag" moronic practice (and let's point out that the possibility of combining portable liquids into a relevantly dangerous substance has been dismissed by any and all scientific communities) by getting a sharpie and writing "Kip Hawley is an idiot" on his bag of toothpase and hair gel. He was also detained and accosted.

And the new "three ounce" rule is so asinine, especially in the TSA agents' inability to enforce it correctly or consistently. Is it that the container has to be less than three fluid ounces, or contain less than three fluid ounces of fluid? There are many tales of people losing their nearly-empty tubes of toothpaste as even though there was less than one ounce of toothpaste, the tube could originally contain four ounces.

Wow. We have shown those terrorists haven't we? Thank you Homeland Security for protecting our freedoms-- well, you haven't "protected" them as much as "taken them away." But I sure feel safer with these chapped lips/hands, frizzy hair, and bad breath. Correction: safe from moist hands, groomed hair, and basic hygene.

Halloween Collage

Much fun.

Boo buzz

The Halloween recap is coming.


But I have recevied some e-mail regarding the shootings in the Castro last night and wanted to address that quickly. Last night was the most managed and sane Halloween I've seen in the Castro. However, considering the shooting, that's kind of like saying, "Well other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?"

I saw/experienced no violence this year, and didn't even know there had been an incident until I heard it on the radio this morning. We entered the fete from the top of 19th and spent all our time in or around Moby Dick and exited on the downhill side of 18th, so we were no where near the spot where shots were fired. We had also left around 10:15/10:30 so we were removed in time as well as space.

I did end up at back at Jeff's for a little while around midnight, which is just a around the corner from the shooting. There were cops everywhere all night, so seeing a bunch of cops on that corner looked just like the rest of the event and not out of the ordinary.

Basically, it was a great night with a highly visible police presence that still ended with some bridge-and-tunnel teenage losers mouthing off at each other and getting violent. The clear majority of everyone else was there in costume and there to have a good time. These fuck-ups not only wounded ten people, they may have ruined future Halloweens for tens of thousands.

The San Francisco Chronicle has the story: Two in custody after 10 people are shot at Castro Halloween bash